Well this year, it started on the 15th to the 23rd. Holy Family Catholic Church in Artesia decided to start early so as not to confuse Simbang gabi with the Filipino Mass that is going to be held on the 24th at 7:oo PM.
Unlike in the Philippines where simbang gabi is at 4:30, it is an hour later here. Looking at it, it really isn't a big difference but the thing is before last year simbang gabi was held at night. I was able to complete it once before but I was still back home and it was much more accessible and easier to go. I have been wanting to complete it again but the odds were against me until this year. I went to my 7th mass this morning, 2 more and I completed it. It isn't easy. For one thing, I am not a morning person. Had there not been simbang gabi I wouldn't wake up until 7 or 7:30 to go to work. But now, I wake up at 3:30 and the most is 4. It is quite too early for the 5:30 mass considering that the church is just a mere 10 minutes away. The thing is, I have to take a shower before my aunt does or else I wont be able to that is the reason behind setting my alarm clock at 3:30. I thought it would be so difficult for me to wake up. But surprisingly, the opposite happened and this is coming from someone who probably presses the snooze button more than I should. Sometimes I even wake up before my alarm clock sounds off. I wake up earlier but my sleeping time stays the same. I pretty much just get close to 4 hours of sleep each night. My eyes are tired, yes! I have lost count of how many times I yawn in the course of the day. But my energy hasn't wavered. I am as alert as if I was able to get a full nights sleep.
Every day, the church is full of people not at all bothered by the fact that its really early in the morning and it can be very cold as well. The crowd is a mix of Filipinos, both parishioners and non-parishioners and even non-Filipinos have attended and to think that the entire mass is said in Filipino. There is a mass guide that is provided with the flow of the mass in both Filipino and English but readings, gospels and homilies are said in Filipino. I guess the person beside them is helping in the translation. Aside from being able to experience simbang gabi as if all of us were back home, right after all the masses, there is a "salo-salo". Food is being prepared by the different religious groups of the parish and shared with everyone. Here, people get to know each other, discuss the theme of the day or just share jokes. Someone from Tacloban actually recognized me during one of those. Even the priests join in and make sure to meet and greet each and everyone that came. By the 6th mass, Fr. Johnny, the pastor already knew me and even asked if I was already on my way to work. I was. Should I rethink going to confession there now? =) Not at all.
It was said that the intentions of whoever is able to complete the 9 days will be granted. I knew about this and yes I have my own personal intentions but it is not the sole reason why I wake up early each morning to go to mass. According to the Archdiocese of Manila website, it is not in the quantity of masses that one attended but what matters most is the disposition of the person who receives the blessing. I believe this. Sure it would be nice if my intentions would be granted but more than that I think after the 9 masses, I hope I would have a better understanding of my faith, of my place in this world and what is being asked of me. No, I am not all of a sudden going to turn into this "super person" doing everything but do something within my own life what I feel and think I should. I think being able to experience even just one mass is what inspires people to keep coming back and complete it despite of all the hardships and challenges. I could have easily gave up with all the factors that I have to consider but I haven't. In fact, it is getting easier as the days go by. I am actually looking forward to it. It is going to be a change when all of this is done. I may stick with it, still wake up early but not as early as this or return to my "old" way and that is sleeping in. If there is one realization that I learned from going to these masses is that I can do anything that I put my mind into. I decided early on that I would want to complete the 9 masses and here I am close to fulfilling that. Maybe after simbang gabi I will check back on that list that I have made on what I want to accomplish and change for the coming new year. Find one that I would really like to do and much like with the simbang gabi, follow through it and reap the rewards later. I think there is no greater feeling than a sense of accomplishment of doing something despite of all the factors weighing in and no other motivation but the one coming from within.
Aside from feeling a sense of accomplishment from going to mass, I have all of sudden started taking pictures of the sky as we make a beeline towards the parish hall from the church for the "salo-salo". I wished I would have done it from the very first day but at that time for some reasons it didn't come to my consciousness until one of the churchgoers pointed it out to us and it was indeed a sight to see. It was already the 18th. I missed 3 days. Isn't it sad that such a magnificent thing is right before us but we refuse or fail to see it until someone brings it to our attention. I guess the reason why I didn't notice was I was concerned about my own self, trying to warm myself from the cold. But now, no matter how cold it is, I stop and focus my cameraphone towards the sky and take a snapshot of it. I don't know for what or why but seeing such a beautiful sight makes me feel good and leaves me in awe.
December 18, 2005
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