My maternal Lolo would have turned 90 today if he was still alive. He was 85 when he died. Had Lolo not uproot his family from San Pablo Laguna to Tacloban City, I don't think my parents would have ever met. So I thank him for that. When we remember him it is always attached to food. See, my Lolo was the cook in the family. He was usually up by 5 AM tinkering in his kitchen. Granted its not the best sound to wake up to with all those banging of pots and pans but anticipation boils to the surprise on what dishes he would prepare for that day. My cousins talk of how they would tell him during breakfast they want leche flan for dessert and come lunch time, there is already leche flan ready. He has spoiled us too because after having a taste of his leche flan, everything else does not even compare. I didn't like eating ampalaya (bittermelon) but I changed my mind when I tasted Lolo's ampalaya dish. For some reasons, he did something to take away the bitterness. Now, unless its cooked by a member of the family, I eat any ampalaya dish with caution. Good thing he passed on all his recipes to all his children. Even when he was sick and couldn't cook anymore, he still managed to be involved. Lola was cooking something and he was just sitting in his lounge chair and out of the blue, he would say "kulang ng paminta!". It left us all baffled as to how he even knew about it because he was right, it did lack pepper. He had the most sarcastic sense of humor of anyone I know and said it with a straight face which could make all of us laugh to no end. His many "hirits" would just make us laugh and shake our heads.
Lolo and Lola married young and they were married for 65 years. Looking at them, it doesn't seem like they have been married that long because they were most of the time enveloped in "newlywed bliss". I remember coming home from school when they were visiting us and I saw them sitting by the bench by our porch watching as people went by. Mama told me that they have been there since lunch time and it was already almost 6 when I went home. They would just sit there and talk for endless hours. He also liked to share stories of his growing up years with us. He wanted to become a pilot but due to financial constraints and family obligations he wasn't able to pursue it. But he didn't seen bitter when he would tell us that story. He would just shrug as if it was one of those. Not that he didn't want us to pursue our dreams but he was just merely telling us that there may be other things destined for us. He didn't languish in the "what could have beens", he just dealt with life as it came along. Being the father of 15 children wasn't easy but Lolo tried the best that he could. He made sure that all his children had an education that they could be proud of. He allowed them to pursue their dreams and yet still instilling in them that they have their individual family obligations that they have to attend to. All children took turns looking after the bakery - the family's primary source of income. When Mama took over the management, she instilled in us the very same thing.
I spent a good amount of my growing up years with them around. Up until I was 1, we lived with them at the bakery. When we moved into our own house, we would still spend our time there. Lolo would turn to me to ask for numbers when he would bet on jai alai. I would write the number in a piece of paper and hand it over to him. If he was asleep, I would roll the paper and slip it in between his toes. Lolo spoiled his grandchildren but not to the point of tolerating bad behavior. I don't think he has ever overstepped in his boundary as a grandparent. He doted on us but not once came in between when our parents felt the need to discipline us.
His last few months were tough. He was in and out of the hospitals but he would manage to pull through. Lolo had incredible strength. He didn't allow his age to be a deterrent. He and Lola would still travel from US to Philippines on their own until he got sick. We thought that in February of 2001 we would be saying goodbye but he gave a fight and gave us enough time to prepare ourselves and left in September of that year. Today, as we celebrate another year, we are really celebrating life. We are celebrating the life that he lived when he was still with us and we are celebrating the life that he left in each and every one of us. This is why we remember him with a smile and laugh rather than with tears.
Happy Birthday Lolo Desto!
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